


new chapter

by MaddieandChimney



Series: Rose Universe [8]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27916171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddieandChimney/pseuds/MaddieandChimney
Summary: They're letting go of the past and starting a whole new chapter together. Maddie had thought she couldn't have been happier, on vacation with her two favourite people, until right then.
Relationships: Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han
Series: Rose Universe [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1951450
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

It’s their first extended weekend away just the three of them and it feels heavenly. It’s four whole days in a little Han-Buckley bubble and Maddie can’t remember a time she’s ever been happier. They’re still in California, a few hours away from their home in a beautiful cabin next to a lake and their days have been filled with boat trips and picnics and laughter and probably way too much food.

The added bonus is that the four-year-old is always so exhausted by the end of the day, by seven o’clock, it’s just the two of them giggling and telling stories of their childhood or college days over a bottle or two of wine and Maddie feels as though she’s coming away from their short trip knowing Chimney better than she had before. Not on as deep a level as she feels she did but the little things that are easy to forget but brought up in a haze of alcohol and triggered by memories of each other’s childhood. It’s cathartic and she feels as though it’s everything they needed to truly start moving on from the awkwardness that had been their relationship for a while.

It’s their last day before they have to go back to their lives and both she and Chimney are in work tomorrow and she already feels the post-vacation depression taking grip as she pouts and wraps her arms around Rose a little tighter, pulling her back to her chest as the little girl sits in her lap, happily eating her ice cream.

“I want a little sister.” The words come from nowhere, although Maddie knows enough about children and about Rose to know that they just blurt out their thoughts when they come to them, so she shouldn’t be surprised. But still, she lets out a nervous laugh as she shakes her head and then looks at Chimney who has paused in eating his own monster portion of ice cream as he sits across from them.

“Well, you don’t really get to choose, Ro-Ro,” He starts and neither of them really know what to say but she knows that if anyone can find the gentle words to explain to their daughter, then he can. He’s pondering, for just a second before he smiles at her, “you know how Denny is going to be a big brother?” Rose nods in response, eager eyes on her dad as he talks, “Well, Aunt Karen has to grow the baby in her belly for a while until he or she is ready.”

“But how did the baby get in the belly?”

The question is posed with all the innocence of a child and Maddie can’t help but burst out laughing at the look on her boyfriend’s face when his eyes widen and he shakes his head. His mouth opens for a second and then closes until suddenly, he’s looking at her and her laughter is quick to stop when she realises he’s looking to her for an answer. “Um, you see, girls have eggs inside their bellies and when she’s all grown up and ready to be a mommy, the eggs will grow into a baby.” Her eyes meet with Chimney’s, who’s just raising a brow at her with a smirk on his face and she can tell he’s doing his best to hold back the laughter as he chews down on his bottom lip. It was the best she could come up with at such short notice and she’s four, it’s not as though she could go into the whole birds and the bees just yet. Although, judging by Chimney’s current reaction, she already suspects that might be something she’ll have to do when the time is right.

“Cool!” Rose only shrugs her shoulders before she starts focusing on her ice cream again and Maddie can’t stop the laughter that falls from her lips at just how ridiculously easy it was to explain it to her, pressing her lips to the back of her head as she pulls her a little closer, ignoring the stickiness of the ice cream that is getting _everywhere_ as it drips onto her hands and her arms that rest on Rose’s lap.

She doesn’t notice that Chimney is staring at the two of them until she looks up, a bright grin on her face as she does, watching as he pushes away the tub of ice cream with a nervous look on his face. It’s instinct, to let her mind go straight to the she had something wrong or she had said something that had pushed him too far place but then he’s smiling at her and she lets herself relax, just a little. “Hey, Ro-Ro, remember what daddy told you about asking mommy a question?” There’s an eager nod of her head as she starts to squirm in Maddie’s lap, “Come stand by daddy for a second.”

Barely a second passes before the ice cream is discarded, spilling on the picnic blanket as an over-excited Rose giggles and runs to stand next to Chimney, her brown eyes focusing a little too intently and excitedly on Maddie. “I love you and this wasn’t the plan, I had something a lot more romantic planned but I just… I just realised that none of that matters. God, I—“ He glances at Rose who stands proudly by her side, chocolate ice cream covering her face as she smiles brightly. “We—we love you so, so much and I just want to keep this moment, this entire weekend in my memory forever because every single time I think you can’t make us happier, here we are.”

Maddie feels as though she knows what’s coming and whilst it’s a surprise that it’s happening right this very second (and clearly a surprise to Chimney too), it hadn’t been something they’d never discussed. The first thing she notices is that she’s not nervous, not even slightly, she’s almost certain she knows what the question is going to be and all she feels is excitement as she looks between Rose who looks as though she’s about to burst, jumping up and down on the spot whilst Chimney digs through his pocket.

“I carry it around because—well, I didn’t even know where to hide it without you finding it.” He winks at her with a smirk, although she can tell by the way his hands are shaking that he’s nervous. He’s never done this before and she’d never expected to do this again but somehow, just as everything did, it feels right with him. “And you can take it back and exchange it if you don’t like it, I know it’s not—extravagant or… but I can save up and replace it if—”

It’s with a roll of her eyes that she takes the box from his trembling hand once he digs it out of his jacket pocket, “It’s going to be perfect because you chose it, I don’t _need_ extravagant or expensive.” She’d been there, done that and quickly realised that the amount of money someone spent on an engagement ring was not a direct equation of love. The temptation to open the box for herself is quashed when he moves from his sitting position to kneel on one knee in front of her, snatching the box from her open hand as he opens it himself.

The ring is simple and elegant, a diamond in the middle of the silver band, causing tears of pure joy to fall down her cheeks as she takes a breath. “Madeline Elizabeth Buckley, will you marry me?”

It’s an easy decision to hold out her left hand for him as she takes a breath, half sobbing-half laughing as she nods her head, “Y-yes… a hundred times, yes.” His hands are still shaking when he slips the ring on her finger and it takes her barely a second to press her lips against his, one hand resting on his cheek as she holds her hand out behind him for the little girl, pulling away from the kiss to pull Rose and him into a hug the second the little girls hand is in her own.

She was wrong before, _this_ was the happiest she has ever been.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maddie and Rose know that Chimney is having a rough time, so they list all the things they love about him.

Maddie kisses the back of Rose’s head as she squirms on her lap, one arm wrapped around the little girl’s waist while she taps the pen against the piece of paper in front of her with her other hand. The idea had come to her when she was staring at Chimney the night before, her feet on his lap as he stared in front of him, his body present but his mind not quite with her. She knows how hard he’s working in therapy, how difficult it is for him and how sometimes he can’t quite turn his brain off in the way he wishes he could.

She’s been in and out of therapy for years, she understands the toll it can take on a person. She can remember coming back from one session in particular, after the tsunami, and sleeping for sixteen hours because her body and her brain felt so heavy.

But Chimney is a dad and no matter how tired she knows he is, no matter how many thoughts are whirring through his brain when he walks through the door and no matter how much she knows he longs to go hide in the bedroom for sixteen hours just to recuperate, he doesn’t. He smiles and he laughs with her and Rose, he jokes around and then he spends his evenings keeping her company even though she knows he wants to curl up in bed.

He deserves to wake up to something that would make him smile and remind him that he was loved, even in his darkest moments. “Daddy is funny!” Rose exclaims as her next point, having caught Maddie in the act of writing things out that morning, quickly crawling onto her lap and telling her all the things she loved most about her daddy and really, no one in the world was more equipped to tell Chimney how amazing he was than his daughter.

“That’s right, daddy is funny.” She giggles as she writes it down, biting down on her lip when she looks down at all the list of reasons why he’s such a good dad in front of her, reading through some of the words as she takes a breath. They’ve mentioned how kind he is, how thoughtful, how good and safe he makes both of them feel. “What’s your favourite memory of daddy?” She asks, running her fingers through Rose’s hair as she smiles at her. She’s four, so she knows the story isn’t going to profound, but it’ll make Chimney smile and really, that’s all that matters.

The little girl is thinking for a moment until she leans back against Maddie, lifting a tiny hand up to her cheek, “Don’t wanna make you sad.”

“Oh, little star, nothing you ever say could ever make me sad.” Despite her words, she can still feel the nerves rushing through her at whatever Rose is about to come out with, leaning down a little to press a kiss to her forehead as big, brown eyes still look up at her, filled with nothing but concern and love and Maddie, for probably the thousandth time since meeting the two Han’s, finds herself taken aback by the striking similarity between the two.

“After the big, scary wave—” Rose pauses in her words, looking at the woman, as though she’s making sure that Maddie isn’t about to burst into tears just at the memory. It’s not easy to think about and she’s still not gone back to the pier since she’d visited it as some form of self-punishment a few days after the event. The two of them, alongside Christopher and Buck, had talked about it in therapy and it had helped but they were coming up on the year anniversary and Maddie could feel that memory creeping up on her every single day but they were alive and they were lucky. It was hard not to feel entirely traumatised by everything that had happened but she felt grateful, more so as she looks down at the engagement ring on her finger and the little girl in her arms.

When the four-year-old seems satisfied that she’s not going to make her mom cry, she carries on, “Was scared and tired and then daddy took us home and he held me _really_ tight but it didn’t hurt and he told me how much he loved me lots and lots and then he gave me a bath because we were all dirty and smelly.” Rose’s nose scrunches up at the memory and despite the intensity of that day, Maddie still laughs as she shakes her head until the little girl presses on, “Wasn’t scared anymore or cold and daddy sang to me until I fell asleep and then he stayed home for lots of days after! We had pancakes for breakfast and we watched lots and lots of movies and I was _really_ warm because you and daddy wouldn’t stop snuggling me and then daddy let me sleep in your bed and he bought me this!” She holds up the cuddly fish that Chimney had bought her just a few days after the tsunami, as Maddie bites down on her lip, refusing to let herself cry so that Rose doesn’t think she can never talk about that day.

“That’s right, he did.” Maddie had a similar toy from the man who had produced them with a nervous smile on his lips for his ‘two brave girls’ after that day and whilst she hadn’t fully appreciated the sweetness of it all at the time, the more she thought about it, the more she loved him. She concentrates for a second, on writing down a slightly dampened down version of that memory, so they can fit it all on the paper as she smiles to herself.

“Daddy is brave, too.”

“He is.” She nods in agreement, writing that down too, before she adds how strong he is, how he’s been through hell and back more than once and still came out the other side as this amazing dad that she’s proud to call her fiancé.

Rose giggles, looking at the piece of paper that is almost entirely full of writing in front of them, “Daddy is silly, too. And he’s nice. My cookies I made weren’t very nice the other day but daddy still ate five because he’s nice and silly.”

Maddie giggles as she nods her head, “You’re right, I burnt the lasagne the other day because I fell asleep and he ate all the burnt bits so we didn’t have to and he _still_ said it was good.” She does her best to put that into words before she presses a kiss to the side of Rose’s head, “Look at that, we’ve run out of room! Now sign your name here, little star, right next to mine.” She hands her the pen, watching as she slowly focuses on each letter with her tongue out between her lips in pure concentration.

She just hopes that it’s enough to make him smile because he hadn’t genuinely done so the evening before. She hopes he knows how much he means to them just the way he is, whether they have another child or not. Obviously, she still wants to try and looking at all the reasons listed in front of her, she knows exactly why he’s the one man she’s ever thought of bringing a child into the world with. There is no one in the world she’d want by her side more than him. “I’ll go pop this in the bedroom and you go grab your bag for school, we’re gonna be late.”

“Okay, mommy!” Rose excitedly rushes off to grab her backpack, whilst Maddie makes her way to the bedroom, making sure to be quiet because it’s a rare day off for her fiancé and she knows he needs to catch up on some much needed sleep. Maddie places the two pieces of paper on the pillow she usually occupies, unable to stop herself from pressing her lips against his forehead as softly as she can, smiling when he barely stirs before she creeps back out of the room, closing the door behind her.

“Time to go, little star.” She just hopes that Chimney spends as much of the day sleeping as he possibly can with the house empty and the Lees picking up Rose from school to take her to the park as they always do on a Tuesday.

There’s a tiny hand clasped into hers within seconds as she grins down at Rose, “Do you think we’ll make daddy happy?”

“I think we make daddy happy every single day, especially you but sometimes we all need a reminder of how loved we are.” The little girl is nodding her head, as though she’s thinking about it for a second before she looks back up at Maddie just as she shuts the apartment door behind them.

“You love _me_ lots and lots, don’t you, mommy?” Her voice is so innocent and the question makes her heart clench, kneeling down so she’s eye level with the four-year-old, nodding her head.

“I have loved you since the day I met you, you are my most favourite person in the whole world, little star.” Her smile is bright and Maddie’s chest hurts from the tears she holds back when chubby arms wrap around her neck and she takes the opportunity to stand up with her arms around her, holding her close, “Now we really are going to be late.” 

. 

Maddie is about partway through an eight hour shift when her phone rings, smiling when she looks down at the photograph she had snapped of Rose and Chimney fast asleep on the boat they had rented for the day during their vacation together. She’s _almost_ too busy staring at it to actually answer the phone, rolling her eyes at herself before she slips into an empty room and presses the phone against her ear, “Hey, baby.”

“H-hi,” He sounds as though he’s been crying, a thought that immediately causes her chest to tighten, “thank you.” Chimney’s voice is quieter than usual and she can hear him sniffing as he struggles to take a breath before the sound of him shifting in the bed can be heard. “How did you know?”

It’s only been a few hours but the shift had been a busy one, with apparently every single person in LA wanting to come to the ER that morning, so it takes her a moment to catch up before she bites down on her lip, “Oh, was—I’m sorry, I don’t want you to think I was—there was no hidden agenda or anything, I just thought you deserved to hear it. Or read it.”

“No, no, I know that. I just—I woke up feeling so anxious and then I found this and… how did you know this is exactly what I needed?” She’s pouting, mostly because he’s woken up anxious and she wasn’t there which of course, work is an obligation and she loves her job and she can’t be there for him all of the time but it still sucks to know that he woke up, probably needing her and she wasn’t able to be there. At least he had a piece of her and Rose, and all of the things she probably would have said to him out loud in the words he’s read already.

“I’m glad, you were so quiet last night and I know how rough therapy can be sometimes. I think we all need a little reminder sometimes how much we’re loved and appreciated, right?” He sniffs again and she’s already counting down the next four hours and hoping nothing major happens before then so she can rush out of there on time, just so she can hold him. “Rose was so excited to tell me all about the things she loves most about you. We could have carried on but—we would have been late for school.” They _were_ late for school but he doesn’t need to know that.

Her eyes glance down at her left hand as she holds it up, realising just how proud she felt to be wearing that engagement ring and how wide she smiled whenever anyone asked. Maddie had never thought she would get married again, the last experienced had marred her beliefs somewhat. At least until she had met Chimney and everything she thought she didn’t want, she did with him. “It was exactly what I needed and I just… I don’t know how to thank you or how I can ever make you feel as loved as I feel right now.”

“You make me feel that way every single day,” She says with a shrug of her shoulders, peeking out of the glass door to make sure nothing has kicked off whilst she’s on the phone, “anyway, we only wrote down how you make us feel… you do that every single day, Howie. All those words? They’re you. You don’t have to thank me for just putting them down on paper.” Now she’s crying and she knows he is too, laughing as she wipes the tears falling down her cheeks with the back of her hand, “I have too many favourite memories with you to have picked just one to fit onto the paper but… remember when we met for breakfast at the diner near here?”

“Of course.”

“You ordered me breakfast because you wanted to make sure I ate after my shift and we’d only known each other two weeks but we just knew. You told me that you were ready when I was, that you _and_ Rose were ready because it was always going to be a package deal and I should have been scared or nervous but I was excited. It had only been two weeks and I’ve never fallen more in love with anyone, as I did the two of you. And that was the first time I realised it, sitting across from you in that diner as you told me that you and Rose were ready for me and—I couldn’t imagine being happier than I was right then but of course, you’ve proved me wrong a thousand times since. And I know we’ve had hard times, too and it’s not all been sunshine and roses but… falling in love with you was the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”

Now he’s fully crying and she wants to kiss him so badly, “Just tell me you believe every single word? That’s all I need from you… I need you to believe in yourself as much as we believe in you.”

“I do, for the first time… I really do.”

That’s all she needs to hear as she grins, “I should get back to work but I’ll be counting down the hours until I can see you again.”

“Me too, I love you.”

“I love you, too.” She whispers, blowing a kiss down the phone before she hangs up and tucks it safely back into her pocket. It’s just four hours but it feels like an eternity.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck wants to know why Chimney can't let go of the past.

It’s hard for Buck to understand but he tries. For a really long time, he tries as he listens to his sister crying on the phone or sees the sad smile on her face every single time she’s around Karen and her growing bump. Maddie had been through hell and back with her ex-husband and when she’d moved to LA, he had promised himself that she would be happy and he had trusted Chimney with her.

He has a daughter and he’s a good father, so shouldn’t the decision be a simple one? Especially when the decision is between his sister’s happiness and her just… settling. At least, that what he thinks because he knows she’s not going to leave Chimney and they’re engaged now. Isn’t this just the natural progression of things?

Either way, he’s tried to respect his sister’s wishes and stay out of it. He’s tried not to make the snarky comments that long to fall from his lips sometimes when Chimney mentions something, _anything_ about Rose or about Karen’s pregnancy. Maddie has asked him not to say anything but he wants her to have everything she’s ever wanted and he has known Maddie his entire life and the one thing he’d always known about her was that she had longed to be a mother. And it was funny, because before Rose, it was all Chimney had wanted, too.

But Chimney has been in therapy for over four months and they’re engaged now and they’re all celebrating at Karen and Hen’s baby shower and it’s hard to miss the way his sister is fawning over Karen’s thirty-two week bump in complete awe as she asks about a billion questions about how it feels. At least she doesn’t look as though she’s hurting anymore and he knows he should let it go but he’s about three beers in and Chimney is awkwardly looking at a diaper as though he’s never seen one before and it just comes out. Not aggressively, not even accusingly, just—it falls from his lips before he can stop it and he knows Maddie is going to want to slap him. “Why can’t you just learn to let the fuck go?”

Buck doesn’t even think he’s being mean about it, it’s just the question comes out in a clumsy sort of way and could be seen as harsh. It’s obvious by the way Chimney flinches that he’s taken it badly, his own hands clutching a little tighter at the beer bottle he holds in his hands as he looks even more so as though he doesn’t want to be there. Truthfully, Maddie hasn’t mentioned the baby subject to him in weeks, not since before the engagement and she doesn’t look as though she’s in pain anymore. There’s no tears in her eyes or jealousy on her face as she guides Rose’s hand to Karen’s stomach and bursts out into laughter when Rose jumps away with a half giggle-half scream when the over-active baby boy presumably kicks against her tiny hand. The woman is completely unaware of what’s going on just a few feet away from her and Buck can just about make out her explaining how a baby grows to Rose who has even more questions for Maddie than she did for Karen.

She’s _happy_ and she seems completely carefree but he can’t just forget the crying and the confusion and the self-doubt.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Chimney finally breaks the awkward silence between them after he takes a sip of his beer.

“I mean… I get that what happened with Rose was traumatic and god, trust me—if I got that phone call tonight and I found out what you did, I wouldn’t—I wouldn’t know what to do and I get that. I do. But she’s four and she’s the happiest child I’ve ever met, I mean… look at her. Rose is kind, she’s polite, clever, friendly and she’s healthy and loved… and she loves so much. Look how quickly she accepted Maddie into her life and looking at them, you wouldn’t doubt for a second that they’re mother and child and _you_ did that.” Any anger he had felt once is gone, especially when he looks at the unshed tears in Chimney’s eyes when he leans back against the wall and takes a breath, staring at Rose. “I get that you were scared and that you probably felt as though you had failed more times than I’ll probably ever know but you’ve given her a good life. You were a single parent and you gave her more love and attention as one person than Maddie and I ever got from two parents.”

Buck gulps, tearing his eyes from his sister who has lifted Rose onto her hip, the two of them looking at each other with nothing but love and joy. “It’s different this time. You have someone to go through it with you now and I’m not saying any of this to pressure you into a decision I don’t think you want. You’re like a brother to me, Chim, I’ve spent more time with you over the last few years than I have with Maddie. If I thought you truly didn’t want to do all this again,” He gestures to the diapers and baby food and the various gifts scattered around Hen and Karen’s house, “I’d have told my sister a long time ago but you’re the man who told me once that you wanted a big family. That you had spent your childhood alone, never knowing what having a brother felt like until you were fifteen. You once told me Cheaper by the Dozen looked _appealing.”_ Both of them scoff at that memory, knowing it was about hour twenty-two into a busy twenty-four hour shift and Chimney had felt close to drunk because he had been that exhausted.

“So, why the fuck can’t you let it go?”

Chimney finally looks at him with a small smile that appears more of a grimace when he shrugs his shoulders, “I’ve been asking myself the same question for months, Buck. I wish there was a simple answer but I’m getting there, okay? It’s not been easy but I am getting there but we are happy the way we are right now, I promise. I think—no, I know… I know that Maddie is happy.” It’s easy to believe him when the distinct sound of his sister’s laughter can be heard across the room, along with the sudden presence of Rose standing in front of them, grabbing Chimney’s hand as she grins.

“Mommy said you gotta come try the cake! It’s the best! Hi Uncle Buck.”

Buck ruffles her hair, smirking when she pouts up at him, her nose scrunching up as she yanks a little harder on Chimney’s hand, “Come, daddy. The cake is blue but it doesn’t taste like blue. It tastes good, promise.”

“I’m coming, I’m coming. Give me just a second, okay? Go back to mommy.” Rose doesn’t have to be told twice, although she pouts before she runs off and Chimney sets his beer to the side, “Are we good, Buck?”

“Of course we are, you’re my brother.”

“Soon to be official. You know the real reason your sister wants me to try this cake is because she wants to use the same bakery for the wedding cake, right?”

Buck laughs as he shrugs his shoulders, “You best get over there then but Chim?” The other man looks at him, the man he trusts with his sister’s heart, “I know Maddie is happy but… are you?”

The smile tells him everything he needs to know without the use of words, but he’s relieved to hear it anyway, “I’ve never been happier…”

“Daddy!”

“Howard!”

“… or more bossed around.” He shoots the youngest Buckley a wink, before he heads off in the direction of the two (soon to be) Han’s, as Buck takes a breath. He’d gotten it out, he’d said what he needed to say to get it out in the open and he felt better, even if he didn’t get an answer to the question. Maddie and Chimney were happy and that was enough.


End file.
